Love in conflict
"We fight all the time and I hate it."
"It seems like no matter what I do my partner won't just meet me half-way."
"I feel like such a failure in relationship."
I work with couples who are struggling with the blame game. Coaching with me helps partners to listen with more compassion and to speak with more self-responsibility.
Conflict is a normal part of relationships. We typically see it as a bad thing, so we run from, repress or try to make it disappear. Imagine if we reframed it as fertile ground from which to grow together, but where are we taught and given the tools?
How we communicate with our partner and how we self-connect while in conflict is the foundation upon which all breakdowns have a breathing chance for reaching harmony and love. Let's learn how to express in a way that doesn't hurt the other, and at the same time honors your own needs.
When we recondition ourselves to access our curiosity and kind expression, whole new worlds arise.
Our work will help you:
- Understand what is at the root of your relationship conflict
- Understand the origin of judgments and their genuine usefulness
- Examine the thinking that leads to conflict
- Identify common patterns of language that lead to communication breakdowns
- Build a compassionate communication toolkit
- Cultivate connection instead of habitual pulling away and distrust
- Truly see and be seen by your partner
Through the practice of compassionate communication we can learn to clarify with our partners what we are observing, what emotions we are feeling, and what we want to ask of the other person. We will no longer need to use the language of blame.
Being attuned and responsive to our partner is everything. With the couples I work with we explore what it feels like to be appreciated and respected, we move through heartache, practice effective communication, and find our way back to deep and nurturing connection. Our work helps them discover ways to be accessible, responsive and engaged with their lover. Then, with more of this safe haven they have with their loved one, the more assured, assertive, and adventurous they are in other areas of their life!
You can count on laughing a bit, crying as much as you need, and knowing that your anger, anxiety, and others have a righteous seat at the table too.
How long is each session? 50 minutes. Sometimes 90-minute or double sessions work best for couples to start.
How often do we meet? Most clients meet with me weekly. I strongly recommend meeting on a regular, consistent basis to give out-of-session momentum to our in-session changes. Especially in the first 3-6 months of coaching together, a lot of healing, growth, and transformation often occur that require consistent follow-up. After establishing a strong foundation, some clients will see me for "maintenance" on a less frequent basis. That said, clients are always free to come and go, and I welcome all newcomers to begin by trying a single session to see if working together feels like a good fit.
What are your fees? I request $75 per 50 minute session. In instances where the client is deeply ready and willing to invest in their growth and this fee would pose a financial hardship, I offer a sliding scale. Write to me and let's talk. I do not currently accept insurance.
Where will we meet? At my office in Gainesville, Florida. If you’re not local, we can meet via video. Some unique circumstances make it more comfortable or safe in the client's home.
Questions? Please email me at email@example.com or call 352.727.5417, and I'll get back to you within 1 business day.